Hey, Dark-Chocolate Snobs: The Milky Variety Is Easier to Love

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WHEN DID MILK CHOCOLATE become the pariah of the chocolate world? I’d like to know. Because somewhere between dark chocolate being deemed “a terrific source of antioxidants” and fashion dictating that we fixate on the percentage, origin and purity of the cacao—scrutinized all the way from bean to bar—it’s grown really uncool to like milk chocolate. So, do we not like candy anymore? Do we not like puppies? When chocolate became the domain of connoisseurs, it stopped being fun. Milk chocolate is fun. Its sole goal is to make your mouth happy. It’s like the golden retriever of foods: uncomplicated, comforting, eager to please. I like milk chocolate. It’s a confection. It’s sweet and, yes, it’s milky. There are no tannins. It’s not meant to be analyzed, just enjoyed. Dark-chocolate partisans can cling to their holier-than-thou embrace of the bitter, but I am not throwing milk chocolate under the bus, and neither should you. Unless you want to stop eating your kids’ Halloween candy, getting Milk Duds at the movies or, fine, indulging in bean-to-bar versions of milk chocolate (often re-dubbed something like “dark milk” to skirt the stigma). What are these single-origin snobs trying to prove?